“Sanguines and Germans and Brits, oh my!”

- Me

I went to Man Day with the guys on 10W today. It made me think of a song. Perhaps you all will recognize it.

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of strength it takes to eat this burrito
With just a fork and a knife
Surrounded by the sound of a dozen other guys
Groaning ‘round the table
‘Cause they can’t eat the rest

Well the burrito’s calling out my name and it laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times I’ve tried before and failed
The burrito keeps on telling me time and time again,
“Boy, you’ll never win; you’ll never win”

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, “Do not be afraid”
The voice of truth says, “You’re a man for trying”
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

A semicolon is used to denote the end of a statement. Semicolons are extremely important when expressing commands. When improperly used, you can run into extremely frustrating problems. You could easily be confused for hours trying to understand what someone is trying to say on the account of a semicolon. While semicolons are usually needed at the end of every statement, there are a few situations where a semicolon is improper. Some examples include if statements, loops, switch statements, and function definitions.

It is correct to write “my variable equals 15 (semicolon),” but it is not correct to write “if my variable is not equal to 15 (semicolon)” unless you did not wish the if statement to accomplish anything.

Another common trap is the infinite loop. A misplaced semicolon can cause such headaches which usually lead to a nice blue screen of death that involves a core dump of some sort. For example, “for (semicolon) (semicolon)” is a short way of writing an infinite loop. Be warned!

Roses are red
Violets are blue
This poem’s really cheap
And it doesn’t rhyme

In the wake of all of these new “modern” translations of the Bible, I pose this question. What if the Bible was “paraphrased” with the Star Wars fan in mind? Perhaps there would be quotes like this (some of these ideas courtesy of Danny):

• Jesus’ reply to Peter’s confession of Christ (Matthew 16:13-20): “Great, kid. Don’t get cocky!”


• Jesus to Peter after Peter cuts off the servant’s ear (Mark 6:1-6): “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”


• About Zacchaeus the Tax Collector (Luke 19:1-10): “Aren’t you a little short for a tax collector?”


• When Jesus healed a blind man at Bethsaida (Mark 8:22-26): “I think my eyes are getting better. Instead of a big dark blur, I see a big light blur.”


• What Herod might have said to the Magi when they were looking for the baby Jesus (Matthew 2:1-12): “Looking? Found someone I would say, hmmm??? Hehehehehehehehe!!!”


• Jesus’ claim to be God (John 10:30, in context v. 22-42): “I am your Father.”


• A description of Christ (Colossians 1:17): “He surrounds us and penetrates us, and binds the universe together.”


• Paul talks about our new spiritual state in Christ (Romans 8:10, 1 Corinthians 6:19): “Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter.”

And now for some hypothetical situations:

• Jacob’s reaction to hearing about Joseph in Egypt: “A ranking official in Egypt? Gee, I’m out of it for a while and everyone gets delusions of grandeur!”


• Satan to Jesus in the wilderness: “If you will not be turned, then you will be destroyed!”


• Possible exchange between Jonathan and David: “Together again.” “Wouldn’t miss it.” “How we doin’?” “Same as always.” “That bad, huh?”


• God to Elijah in the desert after the incident at Mt. Carmel: “You cannot hide forever.”


• The priests on Mt. Carmel: “We’re doomed.”


• Ackbar at Kidron: “It’s a trap!”


• When Paul preached to the Bereans, he might have said something like this - “Search the Scriptures; you know it to be true.”